First Week: Check!

The first week is coming to a close and it has been very good! So, let's make this quick!

Highlights:
-Relationships are the basis of every action in the Bible. God did not preform any action that did not directly impact a relationship. Makes me rethink every way I interact with others.
-We, as a class, discussed hearing the voice of God. We then proceeded to listen to God and shared what He said. He spoke to all of us differently with different verses, pictures and lyrics, yet somehow they all connected. I have never done listening prayer in a big group.
-Got ask to lunch by a homeless man. He then ask for my email, then phone number. I said no to all. His response, "No disrespect. I guess we'll just see how time works itself out." Then winked...
-Watching the sunset over the mountains. The clouds turn into this pink purple hazy glow. WOW!
-I have been making the coffee in the morning. God and I are spending much time over coffee in the morning. I blame Him for my coffee addiction :)
-My roommate Chelsea likes to work out! We ran, yes ran, not a light jog, 1.18 miles the other evening! We took a real quick breather at the half way point. It was super empowering because that is something I do not do. It was a very large accomplishment for me

I also climbed a tree by the fountain in front of Caesar's Palace.

Lowlights:
-I have become accustomed to the prostitutes that live/stand around the block. I am beginning to recognize them in fact. It slightly makes me want to throw up. Especially when I begin to see and recognize the men who hang out around them.
-There is a lady in a wheel chair across and down the street who is in the same spot from, as far as I know, 6 a.m till 8 p.m.
-We went to the strip and through some of the malls and buildings. I passed for the first time high end stores such as Tiffany Co., Louise Vuitton and Dolce and Gabbana. We left these stores and within 5 minutes the side walks under the bridges were lined with sleeping homeless. WHY? Why is this happening? Why do I live such a rich life such a short difference from the poor?
-There are cockroaches. As in you walk into the kitchen and within 5 minutes, you will see at least 3, and that is a good day.

It has been very good. Spending all day with God loving people, learning about the Creator of the universe and falling in love with a city I was determined to hate has been very challenging, but very eye opening. Praise God for what He has done. Praise God for the challenges He has given me. Praise God that I am meeting and seeing His children in a new light. He is good, He is faithful and He is full of new mercies for me everyday!

And So It Began!

I have arrived. I have made friends. I have yet to eat a meal by myself. I almost ate breakfast by myself yesterday, mostly because I was being a crazy person and slept in till 7:00 am Iowa time! However that is only 5:00 am Vegas time. I was up for 2 hours going out of my mind wondering where everybody was! I was able to go outside for my devotions! The doors do have alarms, but I know the passcode. I am looked in this building; I have yet to know if they are keeping the city out, or protecting the city from me. I will even be able to shower every day if I so desire, in fact I could shower every morning and evening.

In 2 Corinthians 1:3,4, it says God will comfort His children in all of their troubles. God's comfort has been very strange this time. Las Vegas is surrounded by mountains like in Alaska and the base itself is a compound which reminds me of Mercedes Christian Church in Texas. I was very upset when God really led me to the Las Vegas base. I did not want to be in the city where there was nothing I loved. But God has comforted me with the desires of my heartWe were driving to Wal-Mart Sunday evening and as we were going down this four-lane highway the mountains were right in front of us. I was stunned and immediately thought, "This looks just like the drive into Palmer, Alaska!" I love Mercedes, it was the first missions trips I ever went on and it was a place where seeking out a way to exercise my leadership ability was encouraged despite my age. God provides in mysterious ways. So often I become so focused on the tasks at hand, I forget to look around me to see God's provisions.

I was even able to go hiking yesterday. No, it was by no means a mountain, but I was able to view the city in a new way. Currently I live in the ghetto.  Am I safe? Yes. Would I be safe if I went into the alley behind our building by myself at night? Absolutely not! There are homeless people around our building and what I would assume to be prostitutes. This view shows how desolate Vegas truly is. They are thirsty and desperately in need of the living water to cover their city.

We enjoyed a lovely picnic last dinner followed by some volleyball. We then went to a staff members house to watch a video of Loren Cunningham speaking, the founder of YWAM. I began this blog by saying how good everything is because I am pretty much getting my way. Loren, however, began his lecture by saying we are to relinquish our rights, starting with the basic right of freedom. To be willing to give everything up so the Lord can work in me, is not something I fully understand. It is to relinquish our rights to voice our opinion, to become anger, to become frustrated, our right of sleep, human touch, sight, our right to hear. Following God is not simply giving up our material possessions and comforts and going, it is giving up everything we contain, our characteristics, passions and dreams.

Maybe I no longer know what it is to live a life in surrender to God. I pray, and ask for prayer as well, that I will know what it is to be on my knees again, surrendering all that I am to the Lord. I ask for prayer that I will pray dangerously and mean every syllable I speak. To no longer live gripping my rights and to no longer pray wimpy prayers for God's will to be done, but praying boldly with complete confidence that God will do miracles believed to only be found in the Bible.

As the Sunday school song says, "This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine." I can not shine my light by simply going through the mundane tasks of life as my secular peer goes through their day. To shine my light is to be intentional, bold, and living a life lead by prayer, not led by me. I ask for prayer that I will relinquish my right to come before the Lord asking for His stamp of approval on my plans. I ask for prayer that I will instead, go before the Lord saying, "Here am I! Send me!"

"But I trust in you, O Lord; I say, "You are my God." My times are in your hands; deliver me from my enemies and from those who pursue me. Let your face shine on your servant; save me in Your unfailing love." Psalm 31:14-16

Just.... Breath

I will be leaving in less than 2 days for Las Vegas. I have been receiving a lot of the same two questions: Are you ready? Are you nervous?

Am I ready? I am to the best of my knowledge. How can I truly be ready for a city with the population of the entire state of Iowa? How can I truly be ready when I do not know what I will be doing, what my classes will be like, who I will be living with or how often I will be able to call home? But, I have my Snuggie and deodorant, so yes, I think I am ready!

The 'am I nervous' question can also be replaced with, 'what are you most worried about' question. What am I worried about? Well, let me tell you! I will be picked up early afternoon on Sunday, is that enough times to make friends? Who am I going to sit with at dinner Sunday night? What will be for dinner? I do not eat food from a can, meat, processed food or very many breads, am I going to end up starving in the corner alone because I have no friends? How often will I be able to do laundry? Will I be close to a post office if I need stamps? Oh goodness, I am stressing out here! I workout to reduce stress, will I be able to work out? Do they have a little gym where I am staying? What if I want to go for a walk in the morning, is that permissible? Wait, I'm a morning person. So Monday morning when I naturally wake up at 5 am what do I do? Do I lay in bed, do I get up, can I go outside and do my devotions outside? What if the doors have alarms and I set one off going outside in the morning? Okay, breathe, just breathe. It will all be okay.

So I go through my list of concerns with other people, typically not giving them the entire list though. And they laugh, often replying with, "So you're not concerned about being robbed, kidnapped, being around prostitutes and pimps, being forced into prostitution and having a pimp, being in the heart of Sin City, or being killed?" Wow, okay, that makes me feel so much better. No, I had not even been concerned about those things, but now I am!

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9

In all reality though, I am exstatic. When David said the joy of the Lord is his strength, I understand that. I am not sitting in my room running through all possible mishaps that I could encounter, in fact I only begin to worry when somebody asks me if I am worrying. I sit in my room filled with joyous emotions. I may be going to Sin City, but God is going to be with me. He will enable me to withstand temptation. Even though I may be walking through streets of darkness and despair, I will not fear the evil lurking around me, because my Shepard will be with me, His rod and His staff of protection will comfort me. I am overwhelmed. If I set off the alarms in the morning, everybody can join me outside for devotions. If there is not a post office near by, I will have a nice walk/workout on the weekends. If I do not have a gym to use as a de-stresser, maybe I will finally learn what it means to fully cast my cares on the Lord. And maybe I will become less of a food snob; let's not push it to far though :)

Please be in prayer for me. God may be with me and He may command me to be strong and courageous, but I am still shaking in my boots.

With much love and gratitude,
Livia Francis Pezley

Begin the Good-Bys

I leave in one week. Everything has been purchased. Now I begin packing for 5 months in one bag. We took our Christmas family photo this morning and had our last family dinner until January. And this morning was the last time I will be in Federated church until 2015. I still have not wrapped my mind fully around this. I will not see the leaves change colors this fall or watch the first snow fall. My grandma found out I will not be home for Christmas, as in they "don't let me come home". I was afraid for a minute she would not let me!

And then there is that thing called college, which I will not be attending this year. I did not think it would be like this. I figured I would joyfully hug my friends good by as they all began their first year of their college adventure. But I saw many students moving into Central this past Thursday and Friday. For some reason, I was a little sad. There was this excitement of buying microwaveable dishes, new towels, and matching a bedspread with extra long sheets! And then your parents drop you off at college, and they leave. You can stay up till, well, actually you never have to even sleep! And you can eat as much food as you want! But of course, you learn that studying is a necessary thing in college, and cafeteria food makes you look and feel gross. Then there is laundry and buying toiletries that will actually be used because you sit by a really cute person in your 8 a.m anthropology course. I will not be apart of any of all this.

I began my goodbys this past Tuesday. The group of girls I have been with since my freshman year of high school met. To think we made it and still find as much joy in each other as we did then boggles me. We all experienced tension between us on a group level and individual level. We dealt with parents, teachers, grades, drama. We went on mission trips and retreats together. We grew together. And now we all just leave.

What a bunch of cuties! Starting on the left: Sydney who I have known since 5th grade when we both went to Sunday school. Rachel since freshman year. Kat since summer before freshman year. And Sarah 5th grade locker partners!

Yesterday I became overwhelmed by the presence of the Lord as I was leaving a friend's house. I have waited to enter the mission field for three years now. I followed the Lord to Alaska instead of Africa. I grudgingly accepted the Lord as I applied for college across town, which I thought would be the death of me! I declared a major, accepting the fact that I would be attending college for four consecutive years. I obeyed as I stayed home this past summer to work instead of serve at camp. And the Lord is faithful. Yesterday God showed me He is giving me the desires of my heart. When His children are faithful in their obedience, He is faithful in His promise keeping. When we align our hearts with His, our paths are His paths. He is giving me the desires of my heart! Can we dwell on this! So often we accept life as life, often missing the fact that God is giving us the desires of our heart! He took notice of what I love, have a passion for, and dream of! I am going. I am leaving everything behind and looking to Him alone for guidance. This is what I have always wanted! This is what every ounce of my body longs for. And yet somehow it is harder than I ever thought.

I begin to not only say good by to all of the people who have faithfully stuck with me, I begin also to say good by to luxury. To the cute boy who makes my medium skim latte, no flavor. I say goodby to biking and early morning walks. I say goodby to my four pillows and three blankets that form a nest around me at night. To the cicadas in the night, Lake Red Rock, picking fresh vegetables from the garden, and having my laundry done. Oh ya, and a very happy wave to all those dogs in the neighborhood who do not understand the idea of not barking!

No matter how hard the good by is, there is this joy inside of me that surpasses all pain and longing for anything different.