Praises!

I am compelled to write because of two HUGE praises I have for God: 1. I slept through the night Tuesday into Wednesday. I woke up right before my alarm and only had one dream that was neither bad nor good. Sounds ridiculous, but I do not remember the last time I slept through the night. 2. It rained on Monday!

I am finding joy in seeing the realities of a fallen world. For example, the other night, I went out with three other young ladies to pass out doughnuts to women on the streets at about 8:30ish. Doughnuts provided us with a way to show love to the prostitutes. My favorite response however came from one lady who replied, "I can only have one, I need to watch my shape." Wait, I think along those lines also! God gave me a connection to the prostitutes. We both like doughnuts and care about our body shape. I have this unnoticed view that I am better because I am not a prostitute, but I am not, we are alike. I am still struggling to process this, but it makes it easier to love when there is a connection.

Last night, Friday night, was outreach night. ODTS (Orphan Care DTS) went over to a family with 5 children, ages 6 and under. I vacuumed for about an hour. I do not know whether I need the vacuum more or the house needed the vacuum more. I hopped around the kitchen with two of the children like a kangaroo and a bunny and we ate frozen grapes. It was perfect. The counters were sticky, floor dirty, children's hair needed brushed, and it felt like home. I miss the family I nanny for. I miss being with kids. I miss feeling like I am making a difference. Lots of times I struggle here on base feeling like I belong and am connecting with the people I live with. I am used to being with kids were if you can make cool flowers out of Playdough, you're in! I have struggled living a "grownup" life, however I feel like God is adding in things, my comfort things, a little at a time, reimmersing me so I can adequately adjust to old life under the new love I have found in God.

Other highlights:

• Wednesday night we helped clean up after baby convention. We helped collected donations the vendors did not want to take home. Living on  base all the time we really do not get to meet new people often. I also fit into some of the stroller and enjoyed being pushed around. 
• Thursday in small group we talked about being a woman. Yes, I am a woman, but no I do not really live by it. I live for jeans and t-shirts. I am not into the dressing up, make-up, girly things. I took the comments of beauty being fleeting and turned them into a lie meaning beauty is pointless. God did not make my body so I could hate it. God made my body so I can love it and others with it. He gave me little arms that struggle opening jars so I can unapologeticly ask my larger armed male counterpart for help, and that is okay. I am learning to take pride in being a woman, and it is very joy filled.
• Thursday night we went over to a staff members house. He and his wife have five children and live in a neighborhood with trees and grass!
• Yesterday I gave two presentations. One of the Bible character Ruth and the other on YWAM Core Value #6, Championing Young People. 
• Tea time is my favorite thing. Tuesday and Thrusday from 10:15-10:30 and Friday from 3-4 we have community bonding time. We are served coffee, tea or chia with expired pastries. YWAM continues to prove it is very sketchy, yet it continues to prove even more the joy of being in community.

Prayer Requests and Struggles:

• I am really struggling from not having human touch. On campus we would give hugs like nobody's business and being a nanny I always had the kids. I never realized how simply touching a person changes them. 
• God is working and rearranging my agenda some more. I ask for prayer on clarity in hearing Him and a willingness to follow.
• This was a tough week. The speaker upset me on a lot of things, but I learned respect. I do not think this will be the toughest week by any means however. I ask for prayer that I learn to not shut down and build up a wall, but that I am open firstly with God and then with others. Please pray for vulnerability.
• Safety for the women on the streets. There is a turf war of sorts happening where we are at. These women are women just like me. They are doing their job and trying to survive. Please pray for their safety and their openness with YWAM and other organizations trying to provide safe havens for them.

Thank you! With much love!

Livia